In A Panic
A friend rang in a panic
I’ve got a mole she cried in despair.
Calm down I said take it easy
There’s no point in making a fuss.
They’re not such a problem I told her
An expert will soon sort you out
Your mole will be gone in a jiffy
You needn’t be making a scene.
It’s not just the one
She screamed down the phone
There’s lots I can suddenly see
And I’m sure there are many
That haven’t appeared yet
But will come in to view any day.
It’s quite normal I told her
At your time of life
To suddenly find you’ve got moles.
An expert will help you
They’ll know what to do
And your problem will soon be gone.
Just treat them with care
Don’t pick them or scratch them
You don’t know what’s underneath.
But my insurance has lapsed
And I don’t have much money
She continued to cry in a wail.
Just calm down I said
And do what I say
The sooner to start on a fix.
If you linger they’ll spread
And take longer to cure
So book an appointment right now.
Well you’re not much good
She cried in disgust
I thought you’d be able to help.
I need something done
Right now if not sooner
These moles will ruin my lawn.